From France

Having coffee with Mom in Metz!

I've been talking to Eduardo a little since I've been in France, and I guess a lot is going on in my absence. He might have to go to Michigan as soon as the end of next week, to work with dad! Thats so fast, and not a lot of time for preparing or planning anything (both of which I am normally inclined to want to do). Now all of the sudden Eduardo is probably going to be in Michigan for Thanksgiving:( That just super bums me out. I thought we'd be together while going through this transition time (i.e. while I am freaking out about everything and all the decisions we will have to make. But now I'm here for another week then he will be in Mi for three weeks after that! This is not what I was hoping for. A month apart during the time when we are making some of the biggest decisions of our adult lives? Lame. But what can we do?

So I guess now he will go with dad to look at places and stuff, and we will just have to talk on the phone about all our plans. I kinda was hoping we would be able to do it all together. But maybe that’s not necessary really.

But still, Eduardo will miss our football games together, the Christmas Party for my work and the Parade downtown, and all the fun Christmas stuff that I had planned for us:( I guess we have to do it, it just really sucks. And it's not like I don't have Mom and Daniel and others to share Christmas with. I do, and they are wonderful, but Eduardo has always been there as well, and I'll miss that part.

So I have been scouting out plane tickets from here, and looking at train schedules (for Eduardo maybe to spend Thanksgiving with his family in Chicago), and trying to figure out how to apply for a mortgage online...

The whole thing just feels really stressful to me right now, and not any fun at all. And I feel like it won't be any fun for us to do together, because we won't be together. Boo. And on top of that we are going to miss most of our holiday season together. Our last Christmas in California for a while...

I still want to move, but this is happening so fast, and not at all in the way I was hoping. I don't want to go into Eduardo and my first big move feeling crappy about it. But now I'm feeling rushed, and sad. I know it sounds dumb to be worried about getting our Christmas tree when we are trying to buy a house and move, but I look so forward to the holiday season. It really is kind of a big deal for me.

I guess I'll stop now, it's only making me sad to write more.